


Avengers in the SCA

by loup_garou



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers join the SCA, Other, if you're not in the SCA this is probably not funny, just silliness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-31
Updated: 2017-12-31
Packaged: 2019-02-24 15:46:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 696
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13216956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/loup_garou/pseuds/loup_garou
Summary: Silly small pieces of fluff, also very much for SCAdians.





	Avengers in the SCA

The Winter Soldier finds the SCA. He doesn't take up fighting because he does that for a living, thankyouverymuch, but learns embroidery because why not. Occasionally he embroiders while waiting for a subway train or enjoying the sunshine in Central Park, and macho men will comment derogatorily on his lack of masculinity. They are met with a flat stare and complete silence, and suddenly become convinced they really should check if they turned off the stove. The Winter Soldier snorts quietly and concentrates on his work again. There is, after all, a neckline to finish. One has to look one's best when being fought for in Coronet.

 

Bucky eventually hauls Captain America along because come ON, Steve, this friend of mine is doing illumination and you really need to try it even if your calligraphy still looks like the claw prints of a drunk crow. Steve does some spectacular scrolls but also really likes siege engines, because it's like throwing the shield only better, and can generally be found nerding it up in a corner over someone's horrendous homemade mead he's too polite not to drink.

 

Tony Stark joins in the fun once, flying over to go to an event in Finland. Being Tony, he ignores all the well-meant advice about drinking with Finns and wakes up the next morning with a hangover that's epic even by his standards, holding his head and moaning But she looked so small! He is revived with coffee and sauna, and decides that apart from making the occasional gadget, such as a smartphone that looks exactly like a wax tablet, this is one crowd he needs to stay away from.

 

Black Widow watches with some well-concealed amazement as her friends participate in this childish business, until she sees a lady in 16th century garb. It's over the top, it's restricting, it's silly, it's...oh so gorgeous. She wants it. It's clothing made for looking beautiful, not to deceive: no one believes she's really from the 16th century and, unlike most of Natasha's lovely gowns, it is not a weapon. No one will die at the end of the night for finding her pretty (although if that count doesn't stop staring at her cleavage, she is not opposed to some slight maiming). It is beauty and playful pretending that has not been weaponised. And she's not taking up fighting even if Bucky wants to be Prince of Love and Beauty. Steve might fight for him but trebuchets are not permitted in the coronet list.

 

Hawkeye goes with Natasha because he's gone everywhere with Nat and this can hardly be worse than Budapest.  
It's worse than Budapest. It's so, so much worse. He cannot bear to watch the archery for even one second longer.  
Ducking into the house to escape, he finds himself in the kitchen. There's a woman there who really has no business reminding him so much of Nick Fury, looking him up and down, followed by one of the most surreal conversations he's had in his life.

What are you doing in my kitchen?  
I..eh...could help out?  
What do you know about cooking?  
.....I know how to eat?

 

He's handed a knife and a heap of onions, and strongly suspects he got the job no one wanted. Twenty minutes later, when he's weeping freely and not even halfway through the pile, he's sure of it. But the kitchen is warm despite his very inadequate clothing (ratty T-tunic borrowed from someone Nat knows), there is booze available, and when his onion-slicing is praised and he's promoted to stirring something he actually feels a sense of achievement. Cooking seems like fun and there is no kitchen window overlooking the archery field.

 

Bruce Banner looks around the tower: everyone is out dressing up and playing weird games, except Tony who still has flashbacks to The Hangover and retires, whining pathetically, if anyone mentions the SCA. It's the first time he's ever been able to shut Tony up, and that's not getting old anytime soon. Finally an opportunity to have a cup of herbal tea, read some of those articles he wanted to look at, and enjoy the peace and quiet.


End file.
